he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
