I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I currently don't understand fingers.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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