PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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