Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
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the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
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I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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