"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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