this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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