why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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