What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
