I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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