Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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