Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize