Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
