did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
