thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
