i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
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