And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
