so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
