I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Randomize
