i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize