Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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