I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Randomize