He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
