i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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