And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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