So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
