Cold hands, warm shart.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
