How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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