So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
