laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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