You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
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