Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize