After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
She's allergic to latex.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
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I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
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I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I didn't notice because vodka
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??