am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I supernannyed him into submission
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
