Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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