Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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