So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize