Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
