Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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