Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Randomize
