does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Randomize
