Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Did I show you my penis last night?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
