You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I think this conversation is over.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.