Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Randomize