So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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