We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life