So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017