Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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