any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
