She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
