Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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