after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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